I went there looking for another moment of quiet. It was my second trip to Starbucks, and I needed this one. I needed to get away from the project, from the pressures of the week – just a bit earlier than normal. It was to be a few moments even away from the social streams and sports. I needed to open up a bit.
I sat with my iPad, the environment was louder than at other times I’d visited this Starbucks. There were more people than usual, and an much higher amount of high school kids. You could see that many of them were just beginning to enjoy moments away from their pressures, structures. And you could also see the challenges, the pressures of a different kind to be different and fit in at the same time. You could see the trends, they were open to parts of the world they’d not seen yet.
Then he came in. Accompanyed by his mother and grandmother. ‘C’ made a b-line from whatever his mother was directing him to towards my table. He looked at what I was doing and asked “what is that?”
You see, some minutes before then (don’t ask me how many), I got the point that God needed my attention elsewhere. So I opened Adobe Ideas on my iPad and looked for subjects. Finding none, I started drawing what was on the table in front of me – my empty Starbucks cup, Nokia N97, and iPad.
‘C’ caught me off guard a bit – I don’t think that I heard him the first time clearly. But he was interested, and so I sat back and told him that I was drawing what was on my table. He had a Nintendo DS in his hand and was clearly very into the game, but this distracted him just enough. So I turned the iPad towards him and asked if he wanted to draw. He looked at me perplexed and so I opened a new canvas and showed him the colors, and how to select a new color. He was engrossed in a new environment.
His grandmother came over first. She cast me a strange eye – I am a bit of a stranger in Danivlle, VA. She watched her grandson like a hawk over her young. And I understood, and so kept myself open and away from the table some. I proceeded to explain to her what he was experiencing and how it just makes sense for him to be on a computer that responds to his touch, rather than a keyboard and mouse. She understood, but was perplexed. Computers (keyboard and mouse toting ones) were still a bit ahead of where she could grasp she admitted.
‘C’s mother came over and apologized a few times thinking that he was distractng me. He wasn’t. I was actually enjoying watching him learn and try his hand (finger) at drawing on my iPad what he had on his DS’s screen. She mentioned that she would like for the iPad to get to the place where she could purchase one for him. He’d seen one, but this was his first time playing with it. I used the word “magic” as that was closest to what he experiences on his DS with the game he was playing. He looked up with those bright eyes that a kid could only have when you say something that hits and they understand that you understand them.
I was there to be open for that moment.
We talked for a few more minutes before they had to leave. The mother was appreciative of giving ‘C’ a chance to play with the iPad. She wanted one too, but was working on making sure she could get to that place of giving her son one first. She knows that it is more his future (and her’s – medical field) and she wants him to be open for it. At least in this moment, he was opened to what life could be like.
Stay tuned for Part 2 of Openness.
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Put It Down
Tuesday, September 21st, 2010This past weekend, got a chance to connect with some closet friends and had a great time with them. And while the iPad did make a solid appearance, and had its own space to be part of the show; the benefit of things was the fact that I was able to put the devices down.
Mobile devices are indeed something well entrenched into the fabric of many of our social moments. There’s calling people, sending pictures and messages, checking in to social networks, and even getting information about things going on around you. In some respects, mobile can play as that extended appendage.
And then there’s that other side of it where mobile is a distraction. You know, you are in that big quiet room and then someone’s mobile goes off. Or, you are in that family gathering and just the appearance of a mobile during that time sends the conversation and eyes of those around you into a sour place. Mobile is an extension, but in some places, that muscle better not be stretched so far.
The latter aspect of mobile was noted to me this weekend by a teenager. She likes her mobile, she likes what mobile can do. But she expressed how her parent’s use of mobile sometimes makes her feel as if she doesn’t count. I can remember being told similar by frinds when I’ve been too attached to my mobile and so it made me stand up and take notice. I started looking at how the parents used their mobile and it was definitely a mirror moment.
What was the reflection? Mobile is a solitary experience. There’s no amount of social networking that can take away from the feeling that others around you get when you dive into that small screen and take care of whatever it is that you want to deal with – but isolates you from those who desire/need you attention.
What causes us to go into that space and not even realize that others are being left out of our lives? The spiritual answer is pride, but I’d rather stay away from that for the moment. I’d like to ask about the perception of the user. When you are using your mobile, do you have any recognition of people around you? Do you pay attention to those times you are diving into your mobile where others are invested into your attention or time?
I know several project mangers who have spoken at length about this and it was simply hard for them to recognize initially. They were focused on a task that reached over into another place and time, and lost focus on the right-now. Many times, when they got back to that place of recognition, they realized all the time they left from loved ones. All the time they missed getting things done because they simply wanted to answer a notification and got lost soon after.
The solution is simple. Pay more attention to your surroundings and make the decision to put your device down. Just put it down and pay attention to your family, the fresh air, your congregation, your business… to God. Fathelessness can also happen when you are sitting right beside your daughter, more entrenched into Twitter than you are into them. Hope this blesses you.
Tags: addiction, attention, kids, mobile addiction, parents, social networking, teens, Twitter
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